Welcome to Attachment Matters.
Attachment Matters is a conversation between two mothers who are passionate about the subject of attachment, and how in parenting our children, we are offered the opportunity to grow ourselves up. This presents unique challenges to parents of children, adolescents, and young adults who adopt a transgender identity. Our hope is to offer greater insight into how to strengthen the attachment between parents and their children, despite all odds.
In this episode, Rose and Stoicmom answer listener questions in part one of this season’s first Q&A set. We were grateful that these questions lent themselves so well to a review of what is meant by alpha in this Neufeldian framework of attachment. We talk much about the importance of getting bigger than the things that would divide us from our children so we can maintain connection and provide the necessary conditions for our children to feel safe and able to rest in our care.
Works cited
The construct of maturation & development we cover in Season 2 is drawn from the Neufeld Institute Intensive 1 Course. Here is an Intensive 1 Preview Video (Part 3 of 3) that gives a taste of the experience of taking Intensive 1 as a live online course with Neufeld faculty. It is full of rich and simple take-aways that reinforce what we cover in our episodes!
Questions for reflection
What pieces of insight are you taking from this episode that may “work” for your situation? What ideas offered do not seem to fit, or would not “work” for you? Are their ideas that you have seen help you over time? If the goal is to help your child rest in their relationship to you, and find room for play, how does this shift your focus on what you can do to work toward that as a goal?
For further reflection
Bouncing Back: Recovering from Stress and Trauma (1 hour 10 minutes) - 2022 Neufeld Conference Keynote. This keynote address lays out a framework for resilience, “bouncing back,” from trauma. Themes touch upon adaptation, futility, play, and more.
The Wisdom of Dependence (30 min) - 2023 Neufeld Conference Keynote. This keynote address lays out the basics of Alpha and attachment as a hierarchical relationship. A great introduction that is under 30 minutes long.
